I soar beneath his wings;

Wednesday, May 31, 2006
爱你一万年

爱你一万年
唱词:刘德华
曲:giorgio moroden 刘德华陈德建

地球自转一次是一天
那是代表多想你一天
真善美的爱恋
没有极限也没有缺陷
地球公转一次是一年
那是代表多爱你一年
恒久的地平线
和我的心永不改变
爱你一万年
爱你经得起考验
飞越了时间的局限
拉近了地域的平面
紧紧的相连
紧紧相连
有了你的出现
占据了一切我的视线
我爱你一万年

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__I never understood x 9:40 pm

Monday, May 29, 2006
Trust

What is trust? The dictionary defines trust as placing confidence in and relying on. As this week i have the opportunity to knock of work early, i had some time to ponder and reflect on my life so far...as a person who rarely like to depend on favours on others, it took me quite a while to trust my Lord for things in my life...many a times i'll would rather have the certainty of things done perfectly according to my plans rather than trusting that the Lord perhaps had other plans installed for me....as i've been planning to purchase my own apartment at the end of the year, i had been saving and making my own plans for the purchase but I heard that there could be some complications regarding my loan application and this sent my spirit very low for the recent weeks...i inquired of the Lord and spoke to a few people regarding this matter but the Lord reassured me again that all will go according to his will for my life...perhaps there may be more changes along the way but now i've learnt that i should keep my eyes focused on him rather than elsewhere and follow his leading and trust that he'll lead me to greener pastures...I'm right beside u Lord!

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__I never understood x 8:19 pm

Saturday, May 27, 2006
A Time for Everything

Indeed theres a time for everything....A time to plant and a time to sow, time to build up, a time to weep, a time to dance, a time to embrace, a time to refrain, a time to lose and a time to keep, a time to throw away, a time to be silent and a time to speak....hence its so important for us to know when to do what isn't? Sometimes its so hard to know but i believe that only through him who holds the key to knowledge and understanding by which we can be able to discern. So often we fail to understand a true heart of a person cause we don't communicate with them on a heart to heart level....i personally believe that there are about 4 levels of friends/communication....the lst level is those I call the "aquaintances".....we have many those in our daily lives, these are the people whom you may only see once in your life time and perhaps you'll never even remember them. The second level are those i call the "Hi and Bye friends"...these are those whom we have more contact with in our lives, it may be our school friends, collegues, business associates....most of the time we communicate with these people on very friendly and polite and business level. We tend to show only one side of ourselves to them. Among these friends there may be a few you'll be able to bring to the 3rd level where you'll reveal more about yourself. The 3rd level friends are those whom you love, trust and would be more willing to share with them more deeply on your thoughts, feelings and you know that you can trust that they'll listen with condemnation and giving appropriate advice if needed..they are those that would be with you through thick and thin and for many years....i would say i don't have too many 3rd level friends but among them there are many who have seen my ups and downs, tolerated all my nonsense..haha...we shared fun, sad, happy times...these are the friends that are always only a phone call away and I know they'll try their very best....Friends on the 4th level is of course much more difficult to get and it would only consists of maybe best friends, your spouse and as for me Jesus is on that level....you may think it strange that I put my friends in categories but i think it is a subconscious thing...i don't see someone and say "hey u are level one person" and shut myself up from them..haha...and many of my friends are also in between levels too!....haha.....we set boundaries for our friends too, to let ourselves and them know where we stand with one another and if fate permits these boundaries could be extended and relationships could be deepen and made stronger....

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__I never understood x 5:44 pm

Saturday, May 20, 2006
When things turn out less than our expectations...

Don't we often wonder why sometimes things don't turn out the way that we want them to or not to our expectations? How should respond to it? Should we kick a big fuss and turn the tables over or should we just accept things as they are? I would admit that i quite a perfectionist by nature but there are times i've done things that disappoint myself and often i would impose perfectionistic ideas on those around me...well i've learnt slowly but surely along the way that everyone is not perfect...even our fingers have 5 different lengths...so same goes for people....everyone has his or her own sets of strengths and weakness and it is important and essential for these differences to exist so that we can co-exist and work together...so we should learn to accept the weakness and draw the strengths out of others rather than to condemn or critise...Life is about human relationships and money surely can't buy love, happiness nor friendships....it would be totally unwise to lose frienships because of difference of opinions, cause each of us is entitled to have his or her own opinions....so don't be short-sighted start looking at things from another angle, perhaps life would be more meaningful and happy....cheers =)

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__I never understood x 10:48 pm

Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Signs of High and Low EQ

Listed below are general characteristics of people with high and low EQ,

A person with High EQ:

Expresses his feelings clearly and directly with three word sentences beginning with "I feel..."
Does not disguise thoughts as feelings by the use of "I feel like...." and "I feel that...." sentences.
Is not afraid to express her feelings.
Is not dominated by negative emotions such as:
Fear, Worry, Guilt, Shame, Embarrassment, Obligation, Disappointment, Hopelessness, Powerlessness,Dependency, Victimization, Discouragement
Is able to read non-verbal communication.
Lets his feelings lead him to healthy choices and happiness.
Balances feelings with reason, logic, and reality.
Acts out of desire, not because of duty, guilt, force or obligation.
Is independent, self-reliant and morally autonomous.
Is intrinsically motivated.
Is not motivated by power, wealth, status, fame, or approval.
Is emotionally resilient.
Tends to feel optimistic, but is also realistic, and can feel pessimistic at times.
Does not internalize failure.
Is interested in other people's feelings.
Is comfortable talking about feelings.
Is not immobilized by fear or worry.
Is able to identify multiple concurrent feelings.

A person with Low EQ:

Doesn't take responsibilities for his feelings; but blames you or others for them.
Can't put together three word sentences starting with "I feel..."
Can't tell you why she feels the way she does, or can't do it without blaming someone else.
Attacks, blames, commands, criticizes, interrupts, invalidates, lectures, advises and judges you and others.
Tries to analyze you, for example when you express your feelings.
Often begins sentences with "I think you..."
Sends "you messages" disgused as "I feel messages" For example, "I feel like you ...."
Lays guilt trips on you.
Withholds information about or lies about his feelings. (Emotional dishonesty)
Exaggerates or minimizes her feelings.
Lets things build up, then they blow up, or react strongly to something relatively minor.
Lacks integrity and a sense of conscience.
Carries grudges; is unforgiving.
Doesnt tell you where you really stand with her.
Is uncomfortable to be around.
Acts out his feelings, rather than talking them out.
Plays games; is indirect or evasive.
Is insensitive to your feelings.
Has no empathy, no compassion.
Is rigid, inflexible; needs rules and structure to feel secure.
Is not emotionally available; offers little chance of emotional intimacy.
Does not consider your feelings before acting.
Does not consider their own future feelings before acting.
Is insecure and defensive and finds it hard to admit mistakes, express remorse, or apologize sincerely.
Avoids responsibility by saying things like: "What was I supposed to do? I had no choice!
Holds many distorted and self-destructive beliefs which cause persistent negative emotions
May be overly pessimistic; may invalidate others' joy.
Or may be overly optimistic, to the point of being unrealistic and invalidating of others' legitimate fears.
Frequently feels inadequate, disappointed, resentful, bitter or victimized.
Locks himself into courses of action against common sense, or jumps ship at the first sight of trouble.
Avoids connections with people and seeks substitute relationships with everything from pets and plants to imaginary beings.
Rigidly clings to his beliefs because he is too insecure to be open to new facts.
Can tell you the details of an event, and what they think about it, but can't tell you how she feels about it.
Uses his intellect to judge and criticize others without realizing he is feeling superior, judgmental, critical, and without awareness of how his actions impact others' feelings.
Is a poor listener. Interrupts. Invalidates. Misses the emotions being communicated. Focusses on "facts" rather than feelings

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__I never understood x 8:54 pm

Tuesday, May 16, 2006
In Perspective- The Emerging Butterfly

Read quite an interesting article in the papers today entitled "Monsters of their own making?" written by a fifteen-yr old handicapped boy;Jeremy Lim. I'm truly amazed at his insight on things...he wrote about how he saw a mum pampering her son and buying him toys just because her son was throwing tandrums at a shopping mall...wow...as for me i'll never be able to tolerate this sort of behaviour...i'll probably give a big slap across their faces i think..=)..this further led me to ponder about disciplining and raising children...in the rat race of Kaisu Singapore, where majority of the parents are overly anxious about their child's education and future, there is a growing tendency for parents to over protect and worry for their child....i personally think that we should take a step back and let children explore their interests and expand their creativity within certain boundaries which i think should be extended to a greater extent...they should be taught how to make independent decisions and realise that whatever decisions they make, they would have to take responsibility for them and live with the consequences....but of course ideally with the full support of their family and friends should they make wrong choices or fail along the way...kids these days think too small; maybe because Singapore is too small physically so it leads to our children seeing only miniture versions of things and partly perhaps its due to the fault of parents as they tend to limit their child...one obvious area is in terms of dreams and aspirations...most parents i've talked to want their child to be doctors, lawyers, engineers and other occupations of prestige...rarely do you find that parents would approve when their child suddenly say that they would like to be artists, technicians and other blue collared jobs...maybe thats the cause of why Singapore has to increasing employ so many foreign workers to fill up these jobs...I think everyone needs to develop and obtain a good set of skills, whether it be manual skills or thinking or logic skills...these are life skills that is essential for an all rounded education...it is pointless to have a child with high IQ skills but absolutely no or low EQ skills...this would truly be a sad and wasted education if that would happen....everyone has his or her own strenghts and weakness and its important to draw out these strengths and develop them to their fullest potential...thinking bigger and broader doesn't come overnite, they need parents, teachers and mentors who think even bigger to influence and guide them along the way, but thankfully our educational system is moving in the right path evocating independent and creative thinking but we still have a long way to go....hope one day things would turn out truly great =)...i'm sure it would..

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__I never understood x 10:42 am

Monday, May 15, 2006
The path ahead

Hmm..its been quite a while since i blogged.Had been very busy lately cause of work..but now that the exams are over, i'll be a little more relax..hopefully..Recently have been spending lots of time doing sports like blading, badminton, and tennis..think it's a good thing cause keeps me healthy and a good chance to lose those excess calories..hehe..Well juz the day before I went to east coast to cycle and enjoy the sea breeze...it was kindof fun but was very tiring after that...yesterday was mothers' day...my sis and I had already celebrated with mum last week...went to eat tim-sum at Minjiang...we visited their new outlet at rochester park..the restuarant was in one of those pre-war colonial style house, it was newly renovated and had quite a cosy atmosphere and the food was good....so yesterday I attended church with a few friends at indoor stadium cause it is pastor prince's birthday today...had quite a good message about rest. It reminded us that we need to rest so that we can think listen to Lord, and when we listen, it would help us to think logically and do only the right things at the right time. I totally agree cause many a times we are overwhelmed by the demands of work, family and friends that we fail to be quiet on the inside to reflect and ponder...so one of my resolutions for the days to come is to rest and rest so that i would be able to walk a longer path more effortlessly....

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__I never understood x 8:08 am